It was lovely to see all of them and as one often says we-don't-see-each-other-lets-do-this-again-soon and this time The Mister and I actually meant it.
However I should tell y'all that it snowed last night. Like, a lot. As Steph has been known to say, it was " Snowmaggedon. "
Anywho, as I was saying, The Buck Stops At Auntie.
Let me paint y'all a picture;
My 2-year old Niece: ( displaying the beginnings an Oprah-worthy Ugly Cry for no good reason..) **Sniff, sniff, snort, curl of lip ** WAAAAHHHHH. WAH WAH WAHHHHH !
Me ( tenderly as possible, but I ain't playing, yo.): Hey, there is no crying at Auntie's house.
My Niece: ( slightly taken aback that someone has told her that crying is not allowed )** Sniff ( pause ) sniff, sniff, ( pause ) boogers descend from nose, lip curls again ** WAAHH-
Me: Excuse me, I told you crying was not allowed at Auntie's house.
My Niece: ( processing this new information with a slight WTF look on her face ) ** Sucks boogers back up into her nose with the force of a Hoover vacuum and tentatively attempts whining instead ** Eeeehhhh...uhhh....waah..
Me: Listen, I'm sorry, but crying and whining is not allowed. This is Auntie's house and she pays the bills. So the only person who gets to cry around here is me, ok ?
My Niece: ( nodding ) ** sucks back more boogs with epic suction force **
Me: Are you ok now ?
My Niece: ( wipes nose on sleeve ) Yesh.
FAST FORWARD SIX HOURS....
My Niece: ( again with the crying bit...) WAHH WAAAHHHH-
Me: Hey, there is no crying at Auntie's. Remember ?
My Niece: ( nods her head ) ** sucks back boogers ** Yesh. ** goes on about her business **
FAST FORWARD.....
My Niece: ( over tired and fighting bedtime )** rubs eyes, binkie hanging loosely from her mouth ** Eeeehhh, uhuuuu, mmmmmhh, weeeennn, eeeehhss......
Me: ( carrying her to the bedroom )Come on, it's time for little girls to go to bed now.
MN: ( Crawls into bed ) ** fuss fuss whhhhhinnee, rubs eyes **
Me: ( pulls the blankets over her ) I'm going to put the blankets over you, you close your eyes and go to sleep.
MN: **Snores **
THE NEXT DAY....
MN ( on a crazy, mad powdered sugar induced spaz attack ) ** doing laps around the house and occasionally stopping in the kitchen to butt her head against my thigh ** SQQUEEEE !! AAAAA HAAAAA !! NA NA NA NA !! HEHEHEHEHEHE !!!
** Stops a lap in the kitchen, falls onto the floor and begins performance art that can best be described as a cross between peddling an invisible bike and moshing **
Me ( staring at MN spazzing out on the kitchen floor ): That's it. You've had enough. You're cut off.
MN: ( looking up at me from the floor ) No ! You off ! ** giggles uncontrollably **
Me: Nope, YOU'RE cut off.
MN: ** points at me ** No. YOU OFF !
Me: Gimme your keys, I'm calling you a cab.
MN: CAWING UM' ! ( I'll translate.. " G'head Auntie, call a cab." )
Me: ( putting plate of xmas cookies out of her reach ) That's it, we're closing up. We're skipping last call tonight. Besides, you've had enough.
MN: ( face down on the cold stone tile of the kitchen floor, beginning her sugar crash ) I OFF !
Me: You said it girlfriend.
So I guess I can add " Getting a two year old to behave " to my list of Mad Skillz.
You thought I was kidding about the powdered sugar induced spaz attack.
She licked the spilled powered sugar off the counter after we made xmas cookies.
Spaz Attack in 3........2...........1
XXOO
Bunny
a.k.a Auntie
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